stress

Frozen

 

DSC00377

My dad is still in the hospital. He had the surgery to repair the aneurysm on Friday and it went well. From what I can gather, his abnormal heart rhythm is what’s keeping him in the hospital. They keep saying they’re going to release him and then they never do.  I haven’t been up there since Saturday and I feel like the worst daughter ever. That drive just wipes me out though. My right arm still hasn’t recovered from all the driving I did last week. Just typing this many words is sending pain up my arm all the way into my neck.

As usual, when I have too many different things going on and feel like I need to be two places at once, I feel frozen with indecision and too many shoulds.

Today I should:

*Go up to the hospital to help Dad decide whether to let them shock his heart to get it into a normal rhythm or whether he should wait until he’s been on blood thinners for a month. But to do that I would have had to leave about an hour and a half ago…. On the phone, we decided to wait and, from what I’ve read online, that still sounds like the safest plan. But maybe there are things I don’t know since I wasn’t there when the cardiologist came in….

*Go over to the vet’s office to buy the prescription kidney diet canned food for Frosty (pictured above) because his kidney and thyroid levels are more out of whack than they were a couple of months ago. I had to take him to the vet for an ingrown claw on Friday (who knew that claws could grow in a circle like that?) so I had them repeat his labs. The vet called last night with the bad news. Poor kitty. At 18-years-0ld, things are really starting to fall apart for him.

*Take Smarty to the vet because, while he’s excited to go out on a walk, he seems to just want to come home once we’re out there. I’m worried that it’s because he’s feeling tired.

*Take Daniel to the school at 3:00 to turn in his final driving test because if they don’t get it graded by the 23rd, it will cost us $175.00 to have him reinstated with the program. It infuriates me that we’re down to the deadline like this because he’s had a month to finish the test. He always does this. Whenever there’s any kind of family crisis, he comes up with some drama that has to be dealt with.

*Rest my arm so it will become usable again. Spending three hours on the road every other day last week is taking quite awhile to recover from.

Maybe I’ll get back to regular blog activities one of these days, if life ever quiets down and I ever get myself (and my arm) unfrozen.

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24 thoughts on “Frozen

  1. I’ve liked your post to offer support, not because I like all the difficult stuff you’re having to deal with – hopefully things get easier for you soon… 🙂

  2. so many things at once. I hope your father gets home soon. I know my friend had a valve replacement which caused an irregular heartbeat which kept him in much longer- such a frustration, but better under watchful eyes I guess. Hope you feel better soon too

  3. David had a similar problem while he was in hospital and they had to do the shock thing. He had it twice because the first time didn’t take but it did the trick the second time. I hope that things will be better for you soon.

    1. Thank you! The more I hear about other people going through the shock thing, the less scary it sounds. I hope my dad has a chance to talk to other people who have had it done or know someone who has had it done. I think it will help him feel better about it, if he does end up needing it.

  4. What everyone said above and then some. Yeah, I’m better at smartass comments than I am at being supportive (Just ask Merby), but I do hope everything sorts out for you soon!

  5. Gosh that heart arrhythmia sounds a big issue. I’ve been diagnosed with SVT (supra ventricular tachycardia) twice and the first thing they did was check my Potassium levels. I wonder…… ? Fortunately, it resolved itself both times without a hospital procedure and/or drugs.

    That’s a gorgeous photo of Frosty.

    …..and I always get off the computer when my arm/shoulder/neck pain gets bad. There’s no other way to resolve that particular arm pain but stop using it. Probably impossible with a family to care for, but you have my sympathy anyway.

    1. I’m glad to hear your arrhythmia cleared up without requiring a procedure. I’m hoping the medication will do the trick for my dad but the more we learn about the procedures, the less scary they sound.

      Do you think your arm pain is due to trigger points? I’m wondering if that’s what’s causing mine. I would like to schedule a massage to help find the trigger points, if that’s what’s going on, but so often massage releases a bunch of toxins that bog me down for awhile and I don’t feel my body is up to dealing with an overload of toxic junk right now.

      1. I hope your Dad continues to improve.

        The procedure offered to me was to sent a wire(?) up through the groin into the heart and ‘zap’ the parts of the heart muscle that were misfiring and causing the arrhythmia. Simple I guess, but like all surgery (including heart of course) it has its risks.

        My arm/shoulder/neck pain is mainly overuse nowadays, so that’s why I try to keep off the computer (including photo viewing or editing), or doing any task which causes pain. Sometimes I can be sitting watching TV at night and the pain starts and I’m not even doing anything. This FM is frustrating to say the least. After I had breast surgery, my whole chest felt like it was only fire for many weeks. Almost like all the nerves were confused by the surgery and they ‘rebelled’ 🙂 If I pace everything and try to keep my body stretches and exercise up, most of my FM pain is minimal. Most of my hip/lower back/sciatic and other pain is nerve root compression from the 2 lumbar back surgeries. The surgery (any surgery actually) causes scar (osteophyte) formation which, over time, compresses the nerves or causes other problems with me. Some days, especially since I’ve been exercising/stretching over the last 7-8 months, I feel pretty good. Other days I’m in excruciating pain. Walking usually helps (despite the FM/CFS fatigue). But my foot/ankle issues from surgery in 1998 and overuse (from power walking) now stop me doing much walking. Having severe obstructive Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy also causes fatigue, chest pain and breathlessness on exertion and other symptoms. So the nerve compression, the cardiomyopathy AND the FM/CFS give me a triple whammy of pain/fatigue. If I eat grains I also fall asleep, feel lethargic and my pain is exacerbated 3-fold. So diet is a 4th whammy which affects my pain/fatigue. Takes about 4 hours for the ‘grain’ effect to wear off. Actually, if I want to go out or do household chores it’s best to do them on an empty stomach.
        At least I don’t work in an office now, so I get up and stretch, sit, lie down or change position pretty regularly. I go to bed when I feel like it and stay in bed until I feel fully rested in the morning. But I’m single and have no commitments, so I literally, do whatever I like, whenever I like.

        Best to get rid of the toxins via massage or acupuncture and clean out your body every now & then. Massage actually hurts me, so I used to have acupuncture, but can’t afford that now I’m not working.

        I couldn’t cope with children and a spouse like you do, but I understand all your symptoms and can sympathise. I don’t know how you manage.

  6. The blood thinner with monitoring sounds like a better long term option after what he has been through. Waiting will also give him an opportunity to gain strength and come to terms with what has happened. The Docs are obviously the one’s who know what should be done though. Your poor arm. You are doing a most excellent job of holding it all together. One foot after the other, one minute at a time. I have had very sick relatives but I didn’t also have a sore arm. ❤

    1. I don’t feel like I’m doing a good job of holding it together! I always swear I will be stronger and less paralyzed by the next crisis but I never am. I’m just not good at dealing several issues at once.

  7. Gosh Trisha, sounds like you’ve got lots going on there. I hope Dad, Frosty, Smarty, and your arm are ship shape soon. Sending hugs and good vibes your way my friend, hang in there! ❤

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